Suicide Prevention

Breaking the Silence: Confronting Ruminating Suicidal Thoughts with Faith and Support

For many years, I fought a silent battle with ruminating suicidal thoughts. It was a fight that often felt isolating, consuming, and relentless. But as I stand here today, I want to share my story, not because it’s easy, but because I know someone else needs to hear it.

Understanding Ruminating Thoughts

Ruminating thoughts are like a mental loop, replaying the same painful memories, fears, or self criticisms over and over. For me, these thoughts were rooted in trauma, shame, and feelings of inadequacy. They became so overwhelming that they often silenced any voice of hope or reason.

But what I’ve learned through this journey is that silence only strengthens the power of these thoughts. Breaking that silence is the first step toward healing.

Why I Stayed Silent

I stayed silent for years out of fear. Fear of judgment, fear of being misunderstood, and fear of looking weak. But in that silence, I suffered. I didn’t realize then that speaking up wasn’t a sign of weakness; it was a declaration of strength.

How I Found Hope

It was my faith that began to pierce through the darkness. I found solace in Scriptures that reminded me of my worth and God’s unfailing love. Verses like “The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit” (Psalm 34:18) became lifelines in my darkest moments.

I also realized that healing required more than prayer, it required action. For me, that meant seeking professional help, confiding in trusted friends, and allowing myself to be vulnerable before God and others.

Practical Steps to Overcome Ruminating Suicidal Thoughts

1. Speak Up

Share your thoughts with someone you trust; a friend, a counselor, or a support group. Silence breeds isolation, but speaking up invites connection and healing.

2. Renew Your Mind

Replace negative thought patterns with affirmations of hope and truth. Meditate on Scriptures like Jeremiah 29:11: “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

3. Build a Support System

Surround yourself with people who uplift and encourage you. Healing is not meant to be a solitary journey.

4. Seek Professional Help

Therapy and counseling can provide tools and techniques to manage ruminating thoughts effectively. There’s no shame in asking for help, it’s a courageous act of self-love.

5. Pray and Surrender

Trusting God with your pain is not easy, but it’s transformative. Surrendering your burdens to Him opens the door for peace and clarity.

A Message to Those Who Are Struggling

If you’re currently battling ruminating suicidal thoughts, know that you are not alone. You are loved, valued, and purposed. The pain you feel now does not define your future. There is hope, even when you can’t see it.

Reach out, speak up, and take one small step toward healing today. You are stronger than you realize, and there is a God who sees you, hears you, and is with you every step of the way.

Resources

• National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 988

• Christian Counseling Resources: Betterhelp.com

• Join my community at www.KimberlyVonshay.com for more support and encouragement.